Workin' Mom Homestead

I’ve dreamed of living on a farm since I was a little girl. I wanted to have a pig farm, where I imagined myself just having pigs as pets. This fantasy was probably brought about by reading Babe and Charlotte’s Web in elementary school. As I got older, I wanted to move to Montana to live with horses. I wanted to be a veterinarian. I just wanted to be surrounded by animals. I also loved nature. I grew up with my mom always planting flowers and teaching me to appreciate trees and other foliage. Even though my toddler years were spent in Jersey City, she made it a point to take us to parks and plant flowers on the fire escape. She told me that we even had raccoons that we’d feed, much to my dad’s dismay.

I grew up going to Earth Day festivals (Earth day is basically my favorite holiday aside from Christmas) and just learning to appreciate Mother Nature. I went to college outside of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, and I absolutely loved the scenery- farms. All kinds of farms- cows, sheep, crops. It was all beautiful to me. I would have moved there if it wasn’t so far away from the ocean. 

When my husband and I bought our house, we got a BIG dog- Nala. She’s 96 lbs of beauty; a Rhodesian Ridgeback. I learned about the breed from watching Dogs 101 on Animal Planet as a child. Anyone feeling nostalgic? Anyway, for years after buying the house, I wanted chickens. However, my husband always said, “We can’t. Nala will eat them.” I did other things to satisfy my desire to live sustainably. I always enjoyed making things from scratch- especially baked goods. I took my step-kids blueberry and apple picking and baked pies with a homemade crust. Saturday morning muffins were always enjoyed in my house. I tried to adopt a low-waste lifestyle as well. I planted some crops (like cucumbers and such) and had a compost pile. Everybody knew I was “earthy” or “hippie” (I guess now it’s called crunchy) and some people made fun of me for it. But I felt most at peace when I was away from people and in nature, and I loved being in the kitchen making good (tasty and nourishing) food for my family.

With the job I had and the area that I lived in, my dreams of farmlife were really just fantasies. But I thought maybe, little by little, I could get a little closer to that lifestyle. So I started composting and planting food in the raised bed that came with the house. Then my husband built me two raised beds. Two years later, he built me three more and got cattle panel to make an arched trellis so that we could do vertical gardening. We bought three fruit trees and six berry bushes that year. I even bought seeds off of an Amish company in Ohio (Berlin Seeds)! I bought seed potatoes that year, rather than using old potatoes from the grocery store, which I had done in the past. This method worked, but my potatoes were always super small. I even bought a small greenhouse with grow lights to start seeds indoors. Yes, I put a greenhouse inside my house. I spent a lot of money on seeds and fruit trees that year, but I saw it as an investment. If I was really going to turn my backyard into a mini homestead, rather than just a gardening hobby, I needed to get quality items. I knew they would eventually pay for themselves, as long as I did things the right way. 

The year before, I had a newborn during the “sow seeds indoors” timeframe, so it wasn’t really a top priority for me. I bought seedlings instead, but it was a pretty weak garden compared to the previous year. Then, fast forward to the next Spring, now I have a toddler. Why did I think that would be easier? He constantly wanted to see what was up with the greenhouse. He knocked down the lights a few times, but only knocked over peat pots once…He did enjoy helping me in the garden though. It just made everything take longer (when you’re constantly keeping an eye on a tiny human while doing something else), but that was okay. He was playing and learning, and I was satisfying my gardening itch. However, I definitely took advantage of nap time to try to get as much down out there as possible!

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Now to the chicken dilemma. I mentioned previously that my husband was anti-chicken for years. Well this particular year, we’ll call it the “homestead positive” year, he finally gave me the green light. At this point though, it was March. I had a toddler. I figured next year would be easier to start the chicken journey. We had just built the new beds and trellis and mini “orchid”. I didn’t think I’d have time to build a chicken coop and learn everything in time to get Spring chicks. Then one day, out of nowhere (we may have been talking about self-sufficiency) one of my coaches at work tells me that his school does a chick-hatching project every year for the first graders and they look for places for the chicks to go. He tells me he can get me some for free. I’m thrilled. At first I told him next year would be best when I’m better prepared. Then I start thinking, perhaps the program will suddenly end next year…or he’ll stop working there…I should get them this year, just to be safe. I already have the skeleton of my chicken coop- an old tree house in my backyard. My son could still have the top level to play as he got older, and the chickens could have the bottom level. I just had to [have my husband] enclose it and build a chicken run off of it. Could we do this over Spring break? Could we have it done in time to get these chicks? Am I crazy?? Their poop would make good manure…

Some of you reading this may think I have everything together, but I don’t. I get frustrated. My house isn’t always clean (dogs and kids). Some days I have to focus on the house, but some days I just say to hell with it and focus on other important things, or just things that make me happy- meal prepping, baking, playing with my son or going for a walk with him, tending to my garden. The house will always be there and it’s never going to be completely clean anyway. I learned this concept from my mom, although she would so eloquently say, “Nana, sometimes you have to say f**k the house.” Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t live in filth. I keep it clean enough, but it’s not perfect. I take more of a “clean one or two things a day” approach. And even then sometimes I still overdo it and burn out. This is why I’m bad at sourdough. I’m too all over the place to be that regimented. When I actually make my brain focus and do it, I love it. However most of the time I just have too much going on. This is why I gave up on it and switched to making yeast bread. It’s hard to “do it all” when you work full time and have kids, as I’m sure many of you know. My point is, show yourself some grace.

I was excited and anxious for the Spring of 2024. I was excited for all of my new plans, but anxious that they wouldn’t come to fruition. I told myself that if my seedlings didn’t grow, or if they grew but died or just weren’t healthy, I’d go to a nursery and buy seedlings. Again, a lot of grace here. The point of this journey wasn’t to add stress, it was for me to enjoy life and create a space that I could take pride in. I wanted to grow more food for sustainability and self-sufficiency, but also just for fun. Like, my life didn’t actually depend on it. The grocery store was literally 3 minutes away. But it’s nice to know that I have the skill set and backyard setup if something were to happen. 

Well Spring break came and went, and my seedlings did not get transplanted. While the first weekend of Spring break was nice (Easter weekend), it rained pretty much the rest of the week, which didn’t give me a chance to transplant. Then I learned that you’re supposed to harden off your seedlings for about a week before transplanting, so I couldn’t even plant the last weekend of Spring break. I was so upset. I was able to get the rest of my starter potatoes in the ground or pots, and I planted my lettuces, nasturtiums, green beans, and the rest of my onion sets that weekend. The cherry tree FINALLY got planted. So it wasn’t the end of the world, but I still felt behind. The berry bushes still were not planted, and my seedlings were still in the greenhouse. That weekend I worked on hardening off my seedlings. On the third day, it was really sunny and my seedlings got scalded! That’s right, they got sunburnt. Doesn’t that seem ridiculous?! I thought so. So I ended the hardening off process and put them back in the greenhouse to recover. A lot of them were  recovering okay, but my cherry tomatoes didn’t seem like they were going to make it. That was the saddest part because out of the three varieties of tomatoes I had planted, the cherry tomatoes were my favorite.

We had off from school the Tuesday after break for Eid. I still had to work a game in the evening, but I took advantage of the extra time earlier in the day to buy strawberry plants. I had a vision of hanging baskets filled with beautiful strawberry plants. I also wanted to buy sweet potato slips, but the nursery wasn’t going to get them in until the next day. Bummer. I knew I wouldn’t have time the next day. Anyway I bought four strawberry plants and planted them right away in old hanging baskets from previous years. I was still sad about my tomatoes and leggy brassica plants. I could always go out and buy some like I had originally told myself, but did I really want to spend more money? And I had worked really hard the last month. But mistakes allow you to improve. I was learning. However the obstacles were still really frustrating me. The day after I planted my strawberries, I woke up to find that rabbits had eaten leaves off of two of the plants. No, I hadn’t hung them yet. Well I certainly hung them after that! Google said they would grow back so I felt a little better. Later that morning I walked out front to find a bunch of dirt on the ground next to one of my potato pots. A dog had dug in there. Damn it! I knew which dog it had to be. Did she eat one of my seed potatoes? I had a feeling she did. I was so angry. I elevated those pots onto some pallets that my husband had stacked up and went about my morning. The German Shepherd was going to be a big obstacle. She was notorious for eating dirt, seedlings (particularly cabbage), the compost pile, and she loved vegetables. The most annoying part about it all was that all of these things were set BEHIND the electric fence, but her collar never seemed to bother her. We could hear her collar beeping like crazy, and I guess the shock just didn’t reach through her thick coat. Or maybe she just didn’t care. All I knew was that we were going to have to fence in our garden and compost pile because of the family dog, which seemed ridiculous. I guess it would help with the rabbit problem though…

One day while scrolling Facebook Marketplace, I saw a garden fence for sale. It was selling for $100, but it looked really nice. I sent the listing to my husband, who picked it up that night. I didn’t even know he was going to get it. I just sent it to him to see his opinion. He said that the lady told him she had 43 inquiries about the fence! He asked why she picked him to sell the fence too. She said that since he could come that night, and they had a mutual friend on facebook, she chose him. Lucky us! The fence helped immensely with the garden bed. The only downside was that the fence didn’t reach my berry bushes. A few days in a row I would go outside to see branches chomped off my blueberry bush. I had planted some marigold seedlings around them, but that wasn’t going to stop rabbits. Eventually, the branch chomping stopped. I don’t know if they just decided that the bush didn’t taste good, or if the dog poop that my Shepherd left nearby deterred them. 

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I didn’t have a cow to milk, but I always joked that I milked myself to feed my son, so that made me a homesteader. I hope you can appreciate my humor. One thing I could do though that “real” homesteaders seemed to do was buy in bulk. I dabbled in the world of dried beans a bit. I knew they were more economical than canned, and to be honest they tasted better. However, I still liked having cans for emergencies- like when I needed a quick dinner- which was quite often since I usually got off work at 6 pm. I only had experimented with black beans though, and only because Lidl once had a sale of 10 bags of Goya beans for $10. One bag makes like 3+ cans, so it was definitely a steal. I needed to up my game in the dried bean department though. I also wanted to start getting some grain in bulk. I always avoided buying the 20 lb bags of rice, because my mom said it would attract mice. I did once have a mouse in my house that got into some rice. There were random grains of rice in the weirdest spots. So there was definitely truth to her advice. But perhaps a different method, like storing them in food-grade buckets in the garage? What other bulk grain could I get? I ate a lot of oats, but where would I buy bulk oats that weren’t meant for horses or something?

All these ideas…they were giving “prepper”, but that wasn’t really my end game. Don’t get me wrong, it’s definitely nice to be prepared. When COVID-19 hit and everyone was really scared, we didn’t go to the store for the first week or so. I was never nervous about food though, because I knew how to make something out of nothing. I always had cans and frozen food items for “just in case” and I always had rice. You can live off of rice and beans. It’s got all the macronutrients and plenty of micronutrients. And while the grocery stores never actually closed down, it was comforting to know I had a plan B until we figured out our next move. I wanted to get bulk grain for economical reasons, and because, well, less trips to the store and less items to have to grab when I do go to the store. I am a working mom after all! I just had to figure out where to get it from…

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Well, my seedlings died. Not EVERYTHING died. My marigolds and brassicas (which I thought would be the first to go) were doing really well. My salad greens were doing amazingly and I enjoyed them early on in the season. However, my tomato, cucumber and green peppers all died. I didn’t harden them off properly, because I had no experience training plants how to live outside (who knew?!) and they got sunburnt. My butternut and summer squash got eaten. So, I had to buy plants. I told myself it would be okay if my seedlings died and I had to buy plants so I was going to give myself that grace. I bought four tomato plants- a cherry for snacking, a plum for canning, and two slicers. I bought a two-pack of butternut squash and four cucumber plants (two for eating and two picklers). I couldn’t find any bells at the nursery so I bought some from Shop Rite, and planted the rest of my pepper seeds leftover from my Berlin seed order. I was about three days past the last planting date for peppers, so I went for it. The seeds didn’t work out, but at least I had the ones I bought.

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I started writing this in the Spring and it is now November. Here are the results of my 2024 planting-

• Marigolds (from seed) were beautiful and super successful! The nasturtiums were also beautiful but eventually got choked out by the sweet potato vines.
• Green beans (from seed) did fairly well. I did a succession planting of them to extend the harvest a bit.
• Sugar Daddy peas (from seed) did well but eventually got powdery mildew and died. The toddler loved getting the peas out so this is a fun one if you have little ones.
• Cucumbers (nursery)- 2 picklers and 2 regular (Marketmoore) did fantastic! We made lots of refrigerator pickles and enjoyed many fresh cucumbers. The Marketmoores were so good- crisp and sweet!
• Butternut squash (nursery)- I got one squash from each plant, but I’d never grown these before so I was still happy. My soil in this bed was poor.
• Summer squash all died. Got powdery mildew every time I tried planting more.
• Basil (from seed) kept getting munched on by something but I got enough for what I needed.
• Carrots (from seed) are still in the ground but they aren’t looking big…again in the same bed with poor soil. Did a succession planting in a pot.
• Onions did fairly well. Not all were big but I got about a month’s supply.
• Tomatoes (from nursery) did pretty well. The slicer and sauce plant got early blight and died after only producing a few tomatoes, but the two cherry varieties did really well all season and are actually still alive! We did have a random beefsteak variety start growing out of a crack in our concrete steps. I did no intervention on it and it has done oddly well and is still alive. Crazy how it did better than the ones I actually took care of.
• Lettuces (from seed) did awesome until they bolted. Had to fight off slugs though.
• Peppers (from grocery store) did okay. Planted in poor soil so not the yield I should have gotten.
• Swiss chard and kale did fairly well.
• Brassicas (from seed) did not grow across the board. The broccoli and cauliflower started forming heads, and then the cabbage moths just destroyed them. The cabbage and brussel sprouts never fully grew. I actually have one brussel sprout plant still in the ground that has tiny heads that I’m hanging onto. The beets never grew besides the leaves.
• Radishes (from seed) only grew leaves.
• Celery (from seed) did pretty well but takes very long.
• Potatoes (seed potatoes from Tractor Supply) did well! Two $7 bags (one blue adirondack and one yukon gold) got me just over 2 months supply. They were the most delicious potatoes I’d ever eaten, especially the yukon gold. Seriously, the flavor is unmatched compared to the grocery store.
• Sweet potatoes (ordered slips from American Seed Co.) did way better than expected. I got more slips than I had room for so I was just sticking them wherever, but I know now that I could get a way better harvest. I got 10 lbs from about 15 slips (ordered 20 for $10 but gave some to my mom). 
• Raspberries were kept in large containers. I got varieties that do well in containers (yellow Anne and strawberry shortcake) and we actually got a good amount. My toddler loved grabbing a couple every time we went outside.
• Blackberries produced a little but the voles ate some. 
• Blueberries did not produce. Well, one bush started to but a rabbit ate off the whole branch.
• Cherry tree produced like 4 cherries.
• Apple trees may or may not be dead. I was not able to water the way I needed to and I think they got attacked by aphids. I guess we’ll see in the Spring if they come back to life.
• Pumpkin got powdery mildew and died both times I tried planting it.
• Garlic (from grocery store) grew but the bulbs were small.

I hope this gives you some inspiration. It’s never going to be perfect, especially when you first start and are learning. But you have to just start. This was the most I’d ever planted and although not everything worked out, I learned a lot and am looking forward to next season!